Black, Blue, and Ornery: Leaving grown men speechless

By
Updated: November 6, 2013

Minnesota Vikings defensive end Jared Allen thinks that hazing is a healthy rite of passage for rookies.

Greetings, compatriots and comrades. Welcome to Water Cooler Sports’ Black Blue and Ornery, your source of a precious few droplets of NFC North news on this Wednesday, November 6th, 2013.

I am stepping in for our normal correspondent Jason Nardiello, who was apparently commemorating the birthday of his roommate last night.

I’d love to bowl you over with words of wit or wisdom, but both fail me at the moment. All I can say is that I’m glad the snow is melting quickly and the sky is clear up here in the Minneapolis area. I grew up in the of southwest Wisconsin. I’m not used to having snow before late December at the earliest.

Quote of the day:

When you’re bored with yourself, marry and be bored with someone else.

– King Edward VIII (attributed)

And on this day in history:

Actress Emma Stone celebrates her 25th birthday today.

  • 1528 – Spanish explorer Cabeza de Vaca discovers Texas — and the rest of the world was put on notice.
  • 1860 – Abraham Lincoln was elected president of the United States of America.
  • 1861 - Jefferson Davis was elected president of the Confederate States of America.
  • 1984 – Shirley Davis kills her husband by spiking his drink with ethylene glycol (antifreeze). He was the second husband she had murdered; the previous four had divorced her. Word to the wise, gentlemen: if your sweetie has been married quite a few times before, run away.

We also have some great birthdays to celebrate today!

  • Emma Stone (25) - Actress who won a Golden Globe for her role in the film Easy A.
  • Sally Field (67) – Actress who has won multiple Academy Awards for Best Actress.
  • Rebecca Romijn (41) – Who could forget her performance as Mystique in the X-men franchise?
  • Ethan Hawke (43) - Actor best known for roles in Training Day, Dead Poets Society, and GATTACA.

NFC North News

Just because you lost your virginity doesn’t mean you can go around throwing your links at everybody!

Detroit Lions

Every puppy loves to pile on when the lion is down, but this time it’s the lions piling on when the bear cub is down.

Both Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler and Green Bay Packers quarterback Aaron Rodgers are out for an indeterminate amount of time with injuries, leading Chris McCoskey of The Detroit News to gloat that Detroit Lions quarterback Matthew Stafford has been proving his durability. Stafford is set to start his “” after missing “19 of his first 32.”

Stafford is also just 287 yards shy of breaking Bobby Layne’s franchise record of 15,710 passing yards. It took Layne 97 games to set the record; Stafford could break it in his 54th.

Then again, Layne never averaged more than 28 attempts per game in any season. Stafford is averaging 41.5 attempts per game on his career.

Players and coaches alike have been vocal in their expressions of disgust regarding the hazing incidents that have occurred down in Miami. Detroit center , saying that the threats and racial epithets were “sickening” and adding that “I can tell you, that (stuff) doesn’t happen here.”

Members of the University of Wisconsin marching band are surely not the only ones who notice the irony.

Bobby Layne’s franchise record for passing yardage has stood for over 50 years, but it seems destined to fall at the hands of Detroit Lions quarterback Matthew Stafford.

Green Bay Packers

This isn’t exactly groundbreaking news, but the Green Bay Packers have come out and officially announced that quarterback . The Associated Press reports that head coach Mike McCarthy was “relieved” to learn the injury is not season ending. No word yet on when Rodgers will return; we’ll learn more later in the week.

McCarthy sure as hell didn’t show it on the sidelines Monday night, when he was visibly panicking, but the coach insists he has “all the confidence in the world” in backup Seneca Wallace. He has ordered the coaching staff to ensure that “,” by which he means he doesn’t want them simplifying the system for Wallace.

Frankly, this strikes me as a recipe for suicide. Wallace joined the team after training camp and preseason were concluded. He has received almost no reps with the starting squad to this point. It was obvious Monday whom he felt most comfortable with: second-string tight end Andrew Quarless.

I’d rather see the Seneca run same five plays over and over — but run them crisply and confidently — than try to struggle with the entire playbook, when he is so obviously overwhelmed.

At least general manager Ted Thompson isn’t trying to run down Matt Flynn. That would be like chasing an inside straight all the way to the river.

Seneca Wallace didn’t show much promise filling in for starting quarterback Aaron Rodgers on Monday Night Football, but Green Bay Packers head coach Mike McCarthy insists he has confidence in his backup.

Chicago Bears

Just in case it wasn’t already obvious to you, Patrick Finley of the Chicago Sun-Times wants you to know that the was a big reason why the Chicago Bears were able to defeat the Green Bay Packers at Lambeau Field on Monday night.

He also points out that rookie right tackle Jordan Mills said the final drive of the game, which ground 9:30 off the clock, was a major morale booster for the team: “It pumps us up,” he said. “It’s something that doesn’t happen often. . . . To see us come together collectively and go on a drive like that, it leaves you speechless.”

Hopefully, Packers defensive coordinator Dom Capers is shifting uncomfortably in his seat right now.

Steve Rosenbloom, known for his confrontational and sometimes incoherent screeds, writes that he ” for Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler to return this week. After watching backup quarterback Josh McCown’s excellent game against the Packers, I can’t say I disagree.

Actress Rebecca Romijn turns 41 today.

Now if Cutler can suit up and play safety, that might be an intriguing possibility . . .

Minnesota Vikings

While not condoning the extreme dysfunction in the Miami Dolphins locker room, Minnesota Vikings defensive end Jared Allen thinks that hazing, when properly controlled, can serve a in the NFL.

According to Master Tesfatson of the StarTribune, Allen argues that a lot of rookies think they have it made when they get drafted and join the team with a sense of entitlement that can disrupt locker-room chemistry. Hazing, in his opinion, can refocus them on the task and hand and show them they still have a lot to learn.

It’s an interesting point of view that may well have a great deal of merit, but expressing it in the current climate could be construed by some as insensitive.

Talk about a man who fully realizes he’s making the long, slow walk to the gallows. Brian Murphy of the Pioneer Press quotes Vikings defensive coordinator after several of his players openly questioned his conservative strategy against the Dallas Cowboys.

“The defense is not designed to give up big chunks [of yardage],” Williams said. “The guys are playing incredibly hard. We just have to continue to execute better.”

He’s a dead man walking — and he knows it.

About the author(s)

Rourke Douglas Decker covers the Green Bay Packers beat for Water Cooler Sports. He resides with his family in the Twin Cities. He can be reached for questions or comments at . Connect with .

1308 comments
BENJATRON
BENJATRON

Carolina held Seattle to 12 SF plays them every year gives up 30 hmmm.

Johnathan Wood
Johnathan Wood moderator

Patrick Mannelly apparently was seen leaving Lambeau in a walking boot, and the Bears just signed a long snapper.

This saddens me greatly.

Chicka Da Bomb Dot Com
Chicka Da Bomb Dot Com

Cami after the next few weeks you will be threatening to not continue to cheer for the Panthers anymore because they go on a losing streak, just like you did at the beginning of the season

BENJATRON
BENJATRON

Not even close huh that's why are the #3 ranked D #2 rush D and #10 vs the pass, fine if you say Niners are better but don't give me that shit that it's not close

natesweet
natesweet

How is Montee Ball still owned in 37% of leagues?

thebaskett
thebaskett

also .. this game will get replayed in the playoffs IMO

PWWAU
PWWAU moderator

 West coast team in Carolina for a noon game. Numbers show they often don't play well. 

thebaskett
thebaskett

niners and panthers are basically in the same situations. both have good win streaks against sub-par teams.. and both have won handeldly in those games.. now that they play we will find out who the pretender is..

TheHairy1
TheHairy1

couldn't have happened to a nicer team

Rob Ryan's Hair
Rob Ryan's Hair

  

Its fair weather fans like Sanya that make us all look bad

tmonson78
tmonson78 moderator

 He doesn't strike me as a fair weather type of fan, unlike you.

natesweet
natesweet

THe only good team the Panthers have faced is Seattle. And they don't have a stellar offense. All the other offenses of all the other teams the Panthers have faced have been struggling this season too. We have not seen what Carolina's defense looks like against a powerful offense. Sometimes the Niners are a powerful offense. Sometimes not. Carolina could get the better of them but I would not count on it. Certainly would not bet anyhting.

ANDYlet
ANDYlet

SF played better offenses. 

Evil Donkey
Evil Donkey moderator

I always hated being up that high. Not phobic, but my stomach is turning looking at that.

natesweet
natesweet

He had not come up with more than 3 FF points in a game until this last game against Washington.

ANDYlet
ANDYlet

probably the percentage of people that gave up after week 2

Evil Donkey
Evil Donkey moderator

 I'd 37% of the league doesn't pay attention

ANDYlet
ANDYlet

  yeah home vs away plays a huge part in this

Chicka Da Bomb Dot Com
Chicka Da Bomb Dot Com

  You must wasnt on here when he kept complaining how bad the coaching is and that he is done with this team

PWWAU
PWWAU moderator

  She's only a Saints fan because of Katrina. 

thebaskett
thebaskett

  agreed, but you cant say that the niners D has stopped great offenses either

thebaskett
thebaskett

  the  niners have played the Rams, Houston, arizona, titans and jaxsonville

There D had to bring it

BENJATRON
BENJATRON

And got smoke by them your point?

All I Do is Win! Win! WIn!
All I Do is Win! Win! WIn! moderator

  SF has played the Jags, rams, Cards, Titans, and Texans.

Ya man, thats a murders row of offenses.

tmonson78
tmonson78 moderator

 That's still about as good of production as Ray Rice has given owners...

thebaskett
thebaskett

in our league you can keep a rookie for the next season.. and keep him for where ever you drafted him.. but he has to stay on your roster the entire year.. so even if you had montee ball you wouldnt drop him because if you got him late enough in the draft.. he would be a good pick next year

tmonson78
tmonson78 moderator

I must was.

and lots of fans must was talk about their teams like that when they're disappointed.

All I Do is Win! Win! WIn!
All I Do is Win! Win! WIn! moderator

     

I agree that the Panthers have faced lower tiered offenses and that should be taken into account. But your argument should also include the Niners in that because of who they played as well.

ANDYlet
ANDYlet

    i never said the San Fran D was legit.  I'm trying to say that the Panthers D is probably overrated due to facing lower grade offenses.  which SF did get tooled, but we haven't seen the panthers vs anything to say otherwise 

thebaskett
thebaskett

    all i am saying is that you cant say that the Panthers D isnt legit because of who they have played, then say the Niners D is legit because of who they have played.. they both have played weak teams..

ANDYlet
ANDYlet

    and the panthers lost to the cardinals.

thebaskett
thebaskett

    and the niners lost.. soooooo

ANDYlet
ANDYlet

    seattle's offense isn't special

All I Do is Win! Win! WIn!
All I Do is Win! Win! WIn! moderator

   You mean two legit offense that ran over the Niners D. Ya that doesnt help your point at all.

thebaskett
thebaskett

   you mean GB Seatle and Indy? they only beat the packers and lost the other two

ANDYlet
ANDYlet

   funny you left out the two legit offenses.

thebaskett
thebaskett

   yes, and they lost to the colts

ANDYlet
ANDYlet

   GB and Indy are better than anything Car has seen. 

natesweet
natesweet

  I drafted him. Dropped him 3-4 weeks ago.